05/14/2013

Hannah is doing well! We were moved out of ICU this morning. She has continued to improve and is on room air for most of the day.

The plan for Hannah is still unfolding. I am praying and pondering it and trying to feel an assurance that it is right. ........not yet come.

The problem is, that she is just doing so well. She is just beautiful and calm and peaceful and looks so well. But, I do know that the cancer is brewing. Last evening just after Mark left she started to complain of bone pain in both thighs. It came on rather quickly and then subsided. After a few hours it became more acute and we gave her.... We expected it to sedate her as well as take away the bone pain. Not to be. Oh, the pain left but she just totally became animated and very giddy. She and I watched 4 movies between 10 pm and 4 am. She was adorable. Laughing and responding to the characters on the screen and just pretty much partying all night. She finally dozed off after 4 and has been peacefully resting for most of the day. I have just been enjoying her peaceful state. The thought of pouring the poison into her is unbearable.

Pray that we can settle on the right strategy. I am so worn out of it all. I have cried buckets of tears and my heart is tired, but I know I am not alone. I was visited by two of the Relief Society Presidents from the previous ward I went to when we were here before. It was wonderful to visit and they had many comforting words. The Church is such a magnificent organization providing for us in our times of need. The Bishop and Jan came on Saturday night and we had a great visit. On Sunday morning they came and administered the Sacrament and it was a very sweet experience. Where would we be without The Gospel and The Church? Unimaginable.